From 08eca96e71d96ad1f8e9b888875ab5570f208d19 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Cameron Katri Date: Wed, 17 Feb 2021 14:05:02 -0500 Subject: Get all the games compiling for iOS --- fortune/datfiles/limerick | 160 ---------------------------------------------- 1 file changed, 160 deletions(-) delete mode 100644 fortune/datfiles/limerick (limited to 'fortune/datfiles/limerick') diff --git a/fortune/datfiles/limerick b/fortune/datfiles/limerick deleted file mode 100644 index 95b50971..00000000 --- a/fortune/datfiles/limerick +++ /dev/null @@ -1,160 +0,0 @@ -A UNIX saleslady, Lenore, -Enjoys work, but she likes the beach more. - She found a good way - To combine work and play: -She sells C shells by the seashore. -% -A computer, to print out a fact, -Will divide, multiply, and subtract. - But this output can be - No more than debris, -If the input was short of exact. - -- Gigo -% -A crusader's wife slipped from the garrison -And had an affair with a Saracen. - She was not oversexed, - Or jealous or vexed, -She just wanted to make a comparison. -% -A dozen, a gross, and a score, -Plus three times the square root of four, - Divided by seven, - Plus five times eleven, -Equals nine squared plus zero, no more. -% -A dreary young bank clerk named Fennis -Wished to foster an aura of menace; - To make people afraid - He wore gloves of grey suede -And white footgear intended for tennis. - -- Edward Gorey -% -A hacker who screwed a mag tape -Was caught and convicted of rape. - To jail he did go, - From which, to his woe -He couldn't get out with ESC. -% -A limerick packs laughs anatomical -Into space that is quite economical. - But the good ones I've seen - So seldom are clean, -And the clean ones so seldom are comical. -% -A linguist thought it a farce -That memory space was so sparse. - One day they increased it. - Said he as he seized it: -"At last! Enough core for the parse". -% -A new dramatist of the absurd -Has a voice that will shortly be heard. - I learn from my spies - He's about to devise -An unprintable three-letter word. -% -A progressive professor named Winners -Held classes each evening for sinners. - They were graded and spaced - So the vile and debased -Would not be held back by beginners. -% -A very intelligent turtle -Found programming UNIX a hurdle - The system, you see, - Ran as slow as did he, -And that's not saying much for the turtle. -% -A wonderful bird is the pelican. -His mouth can hold more than his belican. - He can take in his beak - Enough food for a week. -And I'm darned if I know how the helican. -% -Despising machines to a man, -The Luddites joined up with the Klan, - And ride out by night - In a sheeting of white -To lynch all the robots they can. - -- C. M. and G. A. Maxson -% -Flappity, floppity, flip -The mouse on the m"obius strip; - The strip revolved, - The mouse dissolved -In a chronodimensional skip. -% -If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, -It is slick to stick a lock upon your stock. - Or some joker who is slicker, - Will trick you of your liquor, -If you fail to lock your liquor with a lock. -% -Limericks are art forms complex, -Their topics run chiefly to sex. - They usually have virgins, - And masculine urgin's, -And other erotic effects. -% -System/3! System/3! -See how it runs! See how it runs! - Its monitor loses so totally! - It runs all its programs in RPG! - It's made by our favorite monopoly! -System/3! -% -There once was a girl named Irene -Who lived on distilled kerosene - But she started absorbin' - A new hydrocarbon -And since then has never benzene. -% -There once was a member of Mensa -Who was a most excellent fencer. - The sword that he used - Was his -- (line is refused, -And has now been removed by the censor). -% -There once was an old man from Esser, -Who's knowledge grew lesser and lesser. - It at last grew so small, - He knew nothing at all, -And now he's a College Professor. -% -There was a young lady from Hyde -Who ate a green apple and died. - While her lover lamented - The apple fermented -And made cider inside her inside. -% -There was a young lady from Niger -Who smiled as she rode on a tiger; - They returned from the ride - With the lady inside, -And the smile on the face of the tiger. -% -There was a young man who said "God, -I find it exceedingly odd, - That the willow oak tree - Continues to be, -When there's no one about in the Quad." - -"Dear Sir, your astonishment's odd, -For I'm always about in the Quad; - And that's why the tree, - Continues to be," -Signed "Yours faithfully, God." -% -There was a young poet named Dan, -Whose poetry never would scan. - When told this was so, - He said, "Yes, I know. -It's because I try to put every possible syllable into that last line that I can." -% -A computer called Illiac4 -Had a rather tough bug in its core. - It chewed up its cards - And spewed yards and yards -Of illegible tape on the floor. -% -- cgit v1.2.3-56-ge451